Nonverbal cues

There is a state I am trying to find a word for…. when you feel like you have taken coffee and sleeping pills at the same time and your mind can’t seem to figure out whether you want to sleep or stay awake. That is kind of what I’m feeling right now….after several cups of tea and a long, busy day. Anyway…here we are…still tempted to add some tea because it’s terribly cold but that will be the third cup in two hours….and someone once told me to manage my excesses and I think I took them seriously. It was just one of those passing statements, a bit too blunt for my liking at the time so I just swept it under the carpet….I didn’t want to probe it any further because that would only risk adding more to their rather entitled opinion….but it seems they still got the message across because I am still trying to figure out what they meant.…and I secretly want to go back to that conversation but I doubt they will remember….or if they will relate to it the same way…so ever since…that has been the voice telling me to stop when I think I might be going overboard….just one of many things I think about…one of many I might not figure out.

So here I am again….mko poa? Are you poa? Ok, that is from this influencer on IG called Ebby …..Owner of the grace cup.  I like her…she is the true definition of candid….and in many ways…relatable. I don’t agree with everything she says but I agree with her. If that makes sense. She is secretly my friend…well, a few people are secretly my friends and they don’t even know….is that even a thing or I’m I just melodramatic? Maybe that is the kind of information that people keep to themselves…..the excess ‘they’ were talking about maybe? I will never know…

Lately I have been much amused (and mildly bothered) by how much, time seems to be flying by…just the other day I met a friend and they told me their child is now seven…since when? How? I literally thought they were four and it would have been such an embarrassment had I thought to buy them a gift in the form of clothes or shoes….word of advice….children grow like mushrooms (very un-befitting comparison but you get the picture) if you want to get them a gift, clothing shouldn’t be the first choice…unless you really got your math right. So, there is that….children giving me perspective on time….and me wondering what I have done with mine. It has literally been four months since my last post and I can’t seem to figure out what I have been up to…one thing I know for sure….time has passed. The other day I was talking with a friend of mine and I happened to mention this thing I was planning on doing with someone. So I couldn’t get the date right but I remember when we talked about it…one of my friends had just got engaged at the time, ….then she got married and now her baby is almost a year old….like Wow! I didn’t realise all that much time had gone by…and here I was….still thinking about those plans….that said, I’m making it intentional to avoid ‘making plans’ just to  make small talk….it doesn’t serve anyone…..same way it doesn't serve anyone to play small....

Other than my warped sense of time….I’m also trying to get this other thing into perspective, ‘nonverbal cues’ in case you missed the class, this is simply ‘’all the communication between people that do not have a direct verbal translation’’. A very Basic English class, only that I think I should have taken it more seriously….now that I have educated myself a little more on this topic…I think they missed out other very real life nonverbal cues…like blue ticks and other similar shenanigans (I have waited too long to use this word)...

 THERE IS ALSO THAT...

….and maybe a few more….but….I’m still taking cues and isht….

These are my informative years.